Conference weekend just passed and it was a wonderful spiritual feed and
also a chance to do some soul searching and pondering the changes that I
must make. I try to not come away too discouraged and feeling that I
will never measure up because I know that those thoughts are not of God. One particular story really chastened me, however. One of the seventy,
Elder Natters recounted that he was a troublesome boy and in his mom's
scriptures he found written in red, have patience with and then his
name. She would read from the Book of Mormon every morning around
breakfast and the boy would not listen and would be irreverent. One day
he told his mom, why does she keep doing this because he is not even
listening. This mom took this opportunity to testify of a prophet's
promise that is she would read to her children every day from the Book
of Mormon that she would not lose one of her children and then she
looked at him and said, "I will not lose you". This had a huge impact
on this young man and as he is now a seventy, he obviously made good
choices in his life and she did not lose him. My mind flashed through
all the times I parent my children in anger or let my pride take over
and just the day previous, Caden was doing a lot of flips and his leg
was hurting, I told him he should rest it before he hurts himself
further. Caden gets really angry and flippant when you offer him any
advice. He said basically for me to mind my business and so I got angry
and said, well then break your leg, see if I care. So I was not the
"angel" mother that the seventy had described mothers in that moment. I
have several of those recollections where I let my pride win. Just
after having conference, Rick and I drove out to the property and we
hadn't even left the driveway when I mentioned that we would need to
pull out some of our plants from our front garden because they were just
growing too large and it looks unkempt especially if we want to sell
our home next summer. He totally dismissed my comment without hearing
my argument. I immediately felt my hackles raise and I got mad. I hung
on to that anger for quite sometime. So in my prayer this morning I
was discussing this weakness with my Heavenly Father and I had a thought
come to me that when I feel those thoughts or any words that want to be
spoken that are not uplifting or patient and kind that I will take a
pause and say ,"get thee behind me Satan" to remind myself where those
thoughts are coming from. Then I came out to read my scriptures and I am
in Mark 7-8 and in 8:33 it said "he rebuked Peter saying, Get thee
behind me Satan, for thou savoursest not the things that be of God but
the things that be of men." I mean what are the odds? I mean just another testament that God
hears our prayers and he will answer them or reaffirm them through our
scriptures. I am so grateful for these moments that remind me that my
prayers are heard! So here is to another day and another chance to be a little better and maybe just maybe that quote will apply more often than not!
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